06/16/2015: Lean Cuisine Marketplace Spicy Mexican Black Beans & Rice

This is what the box says the meal will look like!

First Impression: When it was cooking it smelled like curry. I love curry. 

Taste: It doesn't taste like curry. It doesn't taste like...anything, really. It tastes like Generic Mexican Red Sauce From a Can. There are beans and corn and green pepper bits in there, but I found it hard to detect any individual flavors. The box insists there is cheese, but I could not see it after cooking, nor could I taste it. And unless you're one of those "mild salsa is spicy" people, there's no kick to this.

Cooking: 5 1/2 minutes in the microwave, no removal or slitting of film necessary. It heated pretty evenly throughout, but the edges got a little crusty.

Filling level: 2.5/5

Nutrition: 280 calories, 5 g fat, 690 g sodium. Pretty standard frozen meal. Here are the full details.

This is what the meal actually looks like!

Overall: Don't waste your time. There are better frozen Mexican rice meals out there.

Grade: C-

06/15/2015: Evol Sriracha Chicken

This is what the box says the meal will look like!

Taste: This is a very flavorful dish. The sriracha is not overpowering, but if you don't like sriracha and/or spicy things, this is not the meal for you. There is a good amount of chicken, and the veggies (corn, broccoli, and snap peas) are plentiful and flavorful with good texture. The sriracha also helps to jazz up the boring old brown rice. This meal is good. It's really, really good. It's so good that I added no additional salt or pepper. I just inhaled the sriracha goodness.

Side note: This dish contains baby corn, which is one of two items on my list of Stupid and Useless Vegetables. (Water chestnuts are the second.) Fortunately, it's also easy to pick out and there were only two pieces in my meal.

Cooking: Cut slit in film, microwave 3 1/2 minutes, done.

Filling level: 3.5/5, which I'm convinced is the most filling a frozen meal can ever be.

Nutrition: It contains 750 mg of sodium, which is kind of a lot. But it's low in fat and high in protein, and I feel good about the fact that I ate whole grains today. You take the good with the bad. Click here for full nutrition specs.

This is what the meal actually looks like!

Overall: Instant classic, will do business again.

Grade: A+

06/11/2015: Lean Cuisine Favorites Cheddar Potatoes with Broccoli

This is what the box says the meal will look like!

First impressions: It smelled good. Like broccoli and cheese, which is promising.

Taste: It tastes as you would expect, like sad frozen microwaved potatoes and gloppy cheddar. Potato texture is not terrible. The star of the show here is the broccoli, which tastes almost like it's freshly steamed. More broccoli would be appreciated. Pepper helps the overall flavor of the dish, kind of. Generally, it's pretty bland.

Cooking: While not the most involved in frozen meal preparation, the cut slit/microwave 3 1/2/pull back film/stir/microwave 2 1/2 process seems not worth the effort when all you're getting is potatoes.

Filling level: 2/5. This is a side dish. This meal would be great if it were served with steak. And I'm not talking about three little pieces of grainy frozen beef remnants, I'm talking about a fucking steak. A 16-oz. porterhouse. Then I might feel like I'd had a meal.

Mmm, beef.

Nutrition: The nutritional information on my box (which I sadly didn't picture) said 640 mg of sodium (the nutritional information on the website differs). And do you really want to waste 210 calories on something when you could have something...else? Because you're definitely going to want to eat something else after.

This is what the meal actually looks like!
(Pepper action added after cooking)

Overall: This is not the worst thing I have eaten. I would, perhaps, even buy it again...but not as a main course. It could be just fine paired with, say, some leftover chicken. Just don't expect to eat this as a meal and feel satisfied.

Grade: C

06/10/2015: Lean Cuisine Favorite Santa Fe-Style Rice & Beans

This is what the box says the meal will look like!

First impressions: While it was cooking in the microwave, it smelled amazing.

Taste: Well, you know, it's not bad. The beans are a combination of black and pinto. I'd probably like to see a few more beans. There is corn in there, but not much. The green chiles add a nice punch of flavor, but that didn't stop me from adding salt and pepper. (Take that with a grain of proverbial salt; I add them to nearly everything.) The sour cream cheese sauce is nice.

Cooking: This puppy microwaves at 100% for 6 minutes. 6 minutes! It cooked thoroughly and evenly.

Filling level: Immediately after eating, I give this 3/5.

Nutrition: At 290 calories, this is on the higher end of the calories I usually eat in a frozen meal - sour cream and cheese will do that. The beans help pack 11g of protein. Click here for full nutrition specs.

This is what the meal actually looks like!
(Pepper action added after cooking)

Overall: While I wouldn't necessarily describe this meal as delicious it is tasty. I'm okay with that. It felt fine as an entree, though it would certainly do well as a side dish. It was as filling as you can really expect a frozen entree to be. I don't feel as though my lunch were lacking in anything. I am satisfied.

Grade: A-